On a Saturday about 15 years ago, I discovered a skill that transformed the way I relate to fear forever.
It was 11:00 am and I woke up early to get a list of things accomplished that day, but I was stuck in my PJs in a state of paralyzing procrastination.
As time ticked on, I found myself getting more and more anxious.
By the second time I was seeing the same news stories again on the local news loop, I knew I needed to deal with these feelings, or I would be stuck all day.
The time pressure was intensifying minute by minute.
I thought I would try the Energy Medicine Head Hold I did before bed to relax, hoping it would calm me down during the day, too.
I had already lost hours, so I took 15 minutes to lay in this position.
As I rested in this position, I began to feel pulses in my hands, and my body began to relax.
When my alarm went off, I was able to get up and get into action, knocking three things off my list!
With my anxiety calmed, it turned out to be a productive day after all!
What was causing my anxiety was unconscious fear that wasn’t mine.
Growing up, my Dad often warned me of potential pitfalls.
His cautions came from a well-meaning place but disarmed my confidence, nonetheless.
I can still hear his words clearly in my head, “Now, Lara, be careful, because…”
There was always a good reason to be careful, and over the years of hearing this over and over again, I had anxiety before I was about to do A LOT of things as a result.
If I wasn’t engaged in my daily routine, my familiar, that anxiety, HIS anxiety about doing anything new came up.
That Saturday morning 15 years ago, I began learning how to re-parent myself.
By doing that calming head hold, I was soothing my anxieties and sending the message to my body that…
”Even though you are feeling anxious, you are okay.”
Most parents are uncomfortable with their children’s anxieties or fears.
How many times were you told as a kid to:
“Be Brave; It’s not a big deal.”
“Don’t be upset, Be a good girl or boy.”
Our parents were so afraid of their own fears, they told us both to be VERY careful and NOT to be afraid.
Any of you receive these mixed messages, too?
How much do you wish your mom or Dad could have said:
“I see you’re anxious. It’s can be scary to do X, Y or Z. Let’s talk about what might help you feel more comfortable in this situation.”
Yet we expect ourselves to work through anxiety or fear without acknowledging it!
AND, we get annoyed and frustrated with ourselves for NOT being able to perform through it!
Does this resonate?
So, the next time you feel anxious, I invite you to acknowledge it and hold your heart and your head as I showed you in the picture above.
It’s natural to feel anxious when you are doing new or unfamiliar things.
This is why it’s so difficult to change.
This is why most people don’t follow through on their New Year’s Resolutions.
If you feel stuck or if it feels scary or hard, give yourself the gift of your own presence.
Hold your head and your heart and listen for what you need.
Your heart knows the way.
– Rumi
Much love,
