Saturday morning, my husband woke me from a disturbing dream because I was talking in my sleep and seemed distressed.
In my dream I had somehow lost our baby, JP, in a hotel where we were staying.
When I told my husband about the dream later that morning at breakfast because it was still bothering me, he said, “You would never let that happen!”
“I know!” I responded. So why was I dreaming about this?
Why was it still agitating me?
What was my subconscious mind trying to tell me?
Then, I remembered! -Ahhhh! “It was a Full Moon on Friday night!”
A quick visit to my favorite astrology site, ForeverConscious.com, gave me some clues.
Change is in the air under this (Aquarian) Full Moon, and it’s likely that we will be called to shift direction, or perhaps morph and rebirth an area of our life that is no longer working for us.
You don’t have to have all the answers, but keeping an open mind and staying curious to new possibilities is a good way to approach this energy.
Aquarian energy is revolutionary and likes to do things differently. It encourages us to step outside the box and to turn things upside down and back to front in order to find a new and better way.
Embrace this quality when it comes to your life. See how you can break free from any old habits or rigid ideas and practices, and find a new way of seeing or doing things.
Aquarian energy is very much centered around freedom too, so this Full Moon may inspire us to shift and let go of things that make us feel stuck or trapped in some way.
Under the light of the Full Moon, ask yourself- How can I bring more lightness and ease into my life? What do I need to let go of in order to achieve this? See what inspiration follows.
While the July Full Moon may stir the winds of change, as it fades, we should find ourselves feeling lighter and freer. We may feel like we have more guidance and support to lift something that has been weighing heavy on our shoulders.
In the dream, I realized I thought a friend of mine had JP with her, but I was still worried because I wasn’t sure.
As a result, I was berating myself internally about what a terrible mother I was and feeling crushed by the intense pressure of guilt I was feeling.
When JP and I were reunited in the dream, I was still feeling terrible.
It was all very odd.
Whenever I feel any upsetting feelings, I get curious about what my body and psyche are trying to tell me.
After reading about the potential meaning of this Aquarian Full Moon, I energy tested myself to see what might be driving my agitation over this crazy dream.
Both my Kidney and Large Intestine Meridians were out of balance. The emotional theme associated with Large Intestine Meridian is letting go or holding on. The emotional themes of the Kidney Meridian is blame or gentleness with self.
“I can let go of self criticism and be kinder and gentler with myself.”
As I tapped the acupressure points associated with these meridians I felt my body exhale with relief.
The agitation was now gone. Now I just had anxiety in my stomach.
If these phrases are resonating with you, tap these points as you repeat these phrases to benefit from this, too.
As I tested, I realized that was related to my Third, Solar Plexus Chakra, which had to do with identity and the balancing mantra was—– I open my heart to myself.
As I was tapping that chakra and repeating this phrase, it all became clear.
JP, my baby, was symbolizing my first baby, my business. I am working on some new projects now through the fall.
Because they are new, I have realized, I have been constantly thinking about the details and having trouble turning off my overactive, worrying mind.
This weekend, I set aside time to work on one of my projects on Sunday and took the entire day Saturday to take care of myself— took a fun trip with JP to the playground, took an amazing bike ride and got a mani/pedi.
It was glorious!
Opening my third chakra and my heart to myself, was reprogramming an old belief, that:
“Nothing that is worthwhile is ever easy.”
I could remember my father’s well meaning advice when I was a kid, “Now Lar, you have to make sure you pay attention and do everything right, so you don’t screw up and lose opportunities in life.”
While I am not afraid of putting effort into anything, I pride myself on being a hard worker, I have realized everything is soooooo much easier when I take care of myself first.
After the playground with JP and my exhilarating bike ride Saturday, as I sat in the pedicure chair I felt inspired to work on copy for one of my projects!
The words flowed easily from me and I was excited by what I accomplished with it!
This is how everything I am working on right now can flow!
“As I let go of self-criticism and take excellent care of myself everything I want to do flows with greater ease.”
It was time to upgrade that belief from my childhood.
It doesn’t have to be so hard. My projects can flow with greater ease.
When I am feeling inspired, I automatically get in my creative zone where it’s impossible to worry about “doing it right,” because when I am in flow everything feels right!
Thanks, Aquarian Full Moon.
Thanks, bad dream.
Thanks, energy work for helping me learn this freeing lesson!
I hope this story and this exercise helps you release self doubt and open your heart to yourself.
If you had any bad dreams this weekend, I invite you to ponder what your psyche may be trying to teach you.
As I always say, Upset is Access to new Growth and Freedom if you are willing to explore it;)
So much love!