Are Perfectionistic Tendencies Making Your Life Harder Than They Need to Be?

Perfectionism can feel like a secret superpower—until it starts draining your energy, stealing your joy, and leaving you constantly second-guessing yourself.

Take this quick quiz to see if perfectionism might be making life harder than it has to be:

The Perfectionism Quiz

• Are you your toughest critic?
  Do you hold yourself to much higher standards than you expect of your friends, family, or colleagues?
  
• Do you thrive on overachieving?
  Going above and beyond feels like the only way to measure up. Maybe you learned early on that achievement = praise, and now you fear losing approval if you don’t deliver.
  
• Do you only feel good after accomplishing something?
  You get a rush from checking tasks off your list and tying your self-worth to productivity.
  
• Do you struggle to turn your brain off?
  Overthinking, multitasking, and late-night planning sessions make it hard to relax or even fall asleep.
  
• Do you judge your days by productivity?
  Instead of celebrating what you did, you focus on what you didn’t get done.
  
• Do you beat yourself up with “shoulds”?
  You feel guilty when you don’t meet the expectations you set for yourself.
  
• Do you get anxious before starting projects?
  You obsess about “getting it right” and imagine worst-case scenarios before even beginning.
  
• Do you procrastinate—even when you care deeply?
  Projects drag on because you’re trying to perfect every step instead of just starting.
  
• Do you replay past mistakes in your head?
  You obsess about what you “should” have done differently, hoping it will prevent future failures.
  
• Do guilt and shame motivate you?
  A harsh inner voice pushes you to do things out of obligation, not joy.

If you answered “yes” to 5 or more, chances are perfectionism is creating stress and stealing ease from your life.

Here’s the truth:

Perfectionism doesn’t actually protect you. It drains your emotional energy, slows your momentum, and keeps you from enjoying the present.

In other words, it makes life less than perfect.

The Antidote to Perfectionism

When I was auditioning for a performing arts high school, my wise dance teacher gave me advice I’ll never forget.

My mom nervously asked, “Is there anything Lara should practice to prepare?”

My teacher smiled and said, “Have her practice the steps she does really well. Go over the ones she has already mastered.”

At 13, I thought that meant I didn’t have to practice at all (ha!). But now I understand the brilliance in her advice: she was teaching me the importance of self-confidence.

My technique was fine—what mattered was that I felt grounded enough to perform under pressure.

Most of us do our best work when we feel good about ourselves. That’s where freedom and flow come from—not perfection.

A Practice for Letting Go

The next time perfectionistic thoughts creep in, pause and try this simple shift:

1. Remember a time you solved a similar problem.
2. Reflect on what has worked for you in the past.
3. Recall a moment when you felt truly confident in your mastery.

These reminders anchor you in your best self—the version of you who already knows what to do.

Because here’s the thing: All you can ever do is your best. And when you focus on your strengths, you generate energy, creativity, and mojo.

A Daily Reframe

Instead of ending your day by measuring productivity, ask yourself:

• What did I do today to support my confidence?
• What did I do to fuel the flow of my mojo?

Celebrate those wins, however small. Confidence, joy, and flow are far more powerful motivators than perfectionism will ever be.

Watch the video below for a quick energy exercise to help you:

• Release the grip of perfectionism
• Recognize and celebrate your strengths
• Reconnect with your mojo

Much ease and power,