How to Overcome the Elusive Fear of Success

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How to Overcome the Elusive Fear of Success

Last week I tried to take some of the fear out of failure and show you that failure is something all successful people do. It is actually what they do to become successful, Michael Jordan, Oprah Winfrey and Walt Disney included. Failure is how we improve, grow and find mastery!

This week, let’s conquer the elusive fear of success!

We all think we are ready for it, can’t wait to have it, but in actuality, the idea of success often scares us into procrastination mode, and often we don’t even know why.

Change of any kind threatens our status quo, and we are hard wired to avoid it in an effort to keep us safe and in familiar territory doing the same, routine things. It takes extra energy, thought and attention to do something different, and we not only challenge our routine, but we also challenge how we see ourselves in relationship to the other people in our lives, if we deviate from our norm.

Often taking steps toward success means taking steps toward the unknown, and the unknown is always scary even if it is better then what we have!

The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown.
– H. P. Lovecraft

 

 

  • What is going to happen if I start a new job or open my dream business?
  • Will I like the people with whom I work?
  • Will my family be OK with my decision?

Often success requires putting ourselves out in the world in a bigger way, and being seen, which can also be scary, as we don’t know how other people will react.

  • What will people think of me?
  • Will my family still love and support me if I have more money or success?
  • Who am I to do this?
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
– Marianne Williamson….quoted by Nelson Mandela in his inauguration speech

 

 

In my Essential Oil Bible – Releasing Emotional Patterns with Essential Oils by Carolyn Mein, the “way out” statement for Fear of the Unkown is- “Listen to your heart.” When we connect to the reason behind what we are doing, connect to our passion, it re-inspires us. Feeling your Fear of the Unknown, while breathing in this oil, then breathing it in again, as you think the phrase, “Listen to your heart” can get you back in touch with your heart’s purpose.

We all have amazing gifts and talents to share with the world, and it would be great if we could just do what we love, but usually there are other things we have to do, like create a resume and interview, or if you are a business owner, put up a website and/or rent office space and hire employees, among many other not so fun responsibilities.

It’s easy to start procrastinating when such tasks are at hand, and we can make it much easier to stay in action if we can:

  • Remember why we are doing what we are doing, and stay inspired!
  • Get help or coaching with the things that feel hard.
  • Take small actions steps every day, so we can get used to having success in small chewable intervals.

Staying inspired!

Some ways you can stay inspired may be to-

  • Read the biography of some successful people you admire like I suggested last week.
  • Read a “thank you” email one of your clients sent you about how you helped them every day to remind you of your value.
  • Make a list of all the things you love about what you do in a journal or just in your head every day.
  • Think about how good you will feel when you have completed your goal or any action step toward it! When we focus on the feelings of having what we want, it inspires us to take action, and it actually gets us believing what we want is possible, thus harnessing The Law of Attraction.

Get help with the hard stuff!
Years ago, I had a coach instruct me to write down everything I had to do, then check off the things I really didn’t want to do. Out of the things I didn’t want to do, we figured out what I could hire out and what I could do with a friend or colleague, so I could get help getting it done.

I was so resistant to getting a website up and starting my blog. I knew I needed help, so I ended up signing up for Marie Forleo’s B-School with a friend, and I got the, step by step, help I needed to figure out my content, and I hired a web person to help me do the technical parts I just couldn’t bring myself to do. So with coaching, which provided me with the know how and a new sense of what was possible, a little hired help, and the partnership of a friend who was doing it too, I got it done, and you can too!

We are afraid of the enormity of the possible.
– Emile M. Cioran

 

 

So, be kind to yourself, and take small action steps!
Taking smaller, more attainable goals throughout your year gives your central nervous system a chance to adjust to the changes your goal will make slowly and gently, so you can get used to success little by little.

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And, if fear is still coming up for you, remember fear is just a feeling and, it can be released in the body, freeing you to take action:

A great essential oil for Fear of Success is Young Living’s Release Oil, or you can also use Ylang Ylang or Lavendar if you don’t have Release. Rub a few drops of the oil between your hands and…

  • Breathe in oil 3x, as you think of:”Fear of Success”
  • Then, breathe it in 3x again thinking “I accept awareness”

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Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.
– Thich Nhat Hanh

 

 

Letting our bodies know via present mind awareness that we are really OK right now, despite what we are thinking about doing or changing is key. Nothing changes over night. Even people who have what seems like fast success, have been laying the ground work for that growth for years, and you can breathe, take your time, and even enjoy the process you will go through to make it all happen.

When I look back at where I was just 4 years ago when I first took B-School, I am amazed! So much has changed; my business has grown so much!

If you are starting your business, it would be my greatest pleasure to help you through it! Check out Marie’s free videos. If you are decide to enroll in the B-School program this year and sign up through my partner link, be sure to check out the bonuses from me! I will be taking B-School with you, helping you with fear clearing exercises and both one-on-one and group coaching during B-School to help keep you stay inspired and in action!

Get immediate access to Marie’s FREE 3 Part Video Training Series on higher profits and your higher purpose

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lara riggio

Lara Riggio is an Energy Intuitive. Her videos, classes, and sessions have helped tens of thousands discover and heal the mind/body, ancestral, and past life blocks which sabotage health and happiness. She is based in New York City, and works out of her Central Park Energy Center in Columbus Circle.